Today, October 9, 2024 is 282 days… since I have written on this blog.

Nine months and 8 days to be exact; which are also the month and day of my birthday. Nine months is the normal gestation to create a new beautiful being. I can feel the energy flowing in my palms when I write this. Here, today, I am reborn.

I have been procrastinating, avoiding, and distracting myself for nine months and 6 days until, something happened at nine months and 7 days that has broken my hard-shelled facade wide open.

It is also Mental Illness Awareness Week, October 6-12, 2024 in Canada.

Numbers count.

I turned 53 in September. My sister died at this age of complications from breast cancer. This number has hung in the living room of my subconscious mind since she passed. I haven’t feared it, I just have remembered it.

Losing her broke another version of me. A person that died with her because only she could understand who I was and what I had endured both in our family and in my life.

Numbers count.

They are the love language of the Universe. The Vibration that leaves your heart and also your lips, and whispers to reach the right Frequency; numbers are the confirmation in so many ways to send you the messages you are seeking.

This is not something I have “heard of”. I am not skilled in numerology, I am skilled in the Knowing that is shared through Spirit. I understand when I have put my Vibration out and receive the messages in specific and gorgeous combinations in the work I do. I rely on information from a trusted numerologist I have followed for over 12 years to understand. I compare it to what is happening in my life, in my family, in my surroundings. I always thank the Holy Essence of the Universe that sent it.

We are all bound by the Holy Essence of the Universe. It winds like the invisible spider web through each of us, around all of us and within us. Our energy fields connect and depending on how you are living vibrationally, you will reach the frequency meant for you, or you may not.

Are you living in the lower vibration of the Ego?

Are your intentions pure? Or are they a show through harmful actions?

That is what we are marked by, the intentions of who we are, this is what is reviewed at the end of this beautiful life. Not your actions.

The higher vibration of Higher Self and the consistent focus that needs to be practiced and actioned, is the paradise we are all seeking.

Think of how you connect to the vibration of music. The healing nature of connecting with 69,999 other music fans in an arena at a concert. The insane connection of energy and vibration across that entire space. The buzz that is so electric you can see it in the hairs that are raised on your body. The cellular shakedown you can feel in your core.

Numbers count.

How long in your day are you focusing on the lower vibrations?

• The dark focus of engaging in hurtful gossip
• Walking by someone in need, just to whisper frustration of their mere existence
• Expressing anger, which can also be anxiety, to your loved ones who you haven’t seen all day, and they just want your attention
• Not leaving your bed because the Darkness has entered through a crack in the weakness?
• Denying what your vibration has been designed for in the Starry Night of the Holy Tapestry only our heart knows?
• (I think you get the idea)

Is it seconds….minutes….or hours? Even in your nightmares?

How long in your day are you working to stay in the higher vibrations?

• Being of service to another
• Forming a connection while waiting in line
• Doing something intentionally kind with no expectation
• Revealing authentic self in little bits at a time to someone your heart trusts
• Risking with Faith
• Throwing it all up to the Universe and Trusting
• Letting go and letting God
• Practicing the very thing that feels like breathing to you and watching the passionate response of being in the FLOW

Is it seconds….minutes…or hours? Even in your Dreams?

For at least half to these 262 days, I have had the wrong focus, the wrong vision and for the other half of these 262 days, I have asked for and received clear signs of what I am here for and how to be of Service to the Holy Essence of the Universe. To serve God, Spirit and to grow as tall and as wide as I can in this Purpose.

I have some medical conditions that have worked against me this year. That put dark glasses on my Higher Vision. That broke my Spiritual Radio that was broadcasting to send and receive. I have been fighting a toxic tornado some days, hanging by a thread to my authenticity. I had to be literal in my prayers, because I will miss those signs otherwise.

I have asked God specifically to please put people in my path that can help me and also to please place me in the path of others that I can help.

Those people come some days in small ways to assist me and I come to them too. Sometimes, that specific prayer and request is answered in a very large and impactful way, and immediately too.

I am a Conduit, here to help others see through the window of my life experiences.

I understand this now more than ever. I am paying attention to what is Given to me.

I am turning down the overwhelming volume of the mental noise. I am practicing the boundaries I have set. I am feeling the nourishment of the soil surrounding my roots that hold me strong.

It took me over 40 years to figure out that what I have faced has brought the most beautiful lessons and blessings. In each situation you face, there is one in each, even if you cannot see it.

Everything happens for a reason. There are times we are not meant to know the reason, but just know the reason is there as a protection or a projection.

There is no such thing as coincidence. When I looked up how many days it has been since I had written on this blog, which was supposed to be a weekly commitment and Create.

Those days, are 282. Nine months and eight days.

Thank you Spirit, for now I get why.

Numbers count.

Please, if you are struggling with a mental illness, speaking your truth, getting past whatever anxieties that hold your breath, trying to get past how your intricate and exquisite brain is wired, please, remember that help is here. You just don’t see it, hopefully after you read this, you might, or you can help someone else see.

October 6-12, 2024 is Mental Illness Awareness Week in Canada

Letters count too: https://www.camimh.ca/miaw

• 310 Mental Health Support is who you can reach out to in BC that can connect you to a BC Crisis Line without the heartbreak of a wait or a busy signal.

310-6789 http://www.crisiscentre.bc.ca

I pray for your healing; for you to slow your breath and find your center. To put that hand over your heart, because that is your Vibration and your Purpose. You are Loved, I am thankful for You and this Creative space we share together.

All my Love,

HelenB